“So, what are your plans for Homecoming?”
“I’m just going with my friends.”
“Would you consider going with me?”
“I mean I would CONSIDER it…. wait, is this you asking me?”
He chuckles, “Yes.”
“Yes, I’ll go with you.”
This is my funny, sweet, and awkward experience with getting asked out for my first date with my now husband the way I remember it.
Christian and I first met our junior year of high school. I had not had much luck with boys in the past and prayed for a cute transfer student every year. Junior year God answered my prayers when Christian transferred to my school, only I did not realize it at the time. He came from a military family, and his family just got stationed in the area.
We started off getting to know each other because we had an AP US history class together that year. By the end of the year we were friends. I still remember when he told my friends and I that his dad found out he would be in the area another year, which meant he would be back at my school for senior year. He was so excited.
I remember running into each other the first day of our senior year. We compared schedules and found out we had four classes together! Between those four classes, we got to know each other pretty well, and it led to him asking me to homecoming (the conversation that I opened with).
Now 9 years later we are married and have 3 kids, with number 4 on the way! But when was it that I realized that I had found the man I was going to marry?
To be honest, I cannot pinpoint one particular moment where I realized he was the one. Just like every relationship, we have had our ups and downs and since we started dating in high school, we each had to grow up a little bit too. There were moments when I was sure he was the one, but also moments where I had doubts.
The first moment I realized that I wanted to marry him was on June 11, 2012. We had both just graduated high school and had not discussed the future of our relationship. That day we told each other we loved each other for the first time, and that we would try to make the relationship work. We were both heading off to different schools, and for the first time (definitely not the last) we endured a long-distance relationship. It was from this point on that we both had the understanding that we were going to stay together and eventually get married.
As it turned out, both our original schools did not work out for us, and by second semester of our freshman year of college we found ourselves attending the same school. However, I struggled with the adjustment of college, making friends, and deciding on my future.
First semester of our sophomore year, we were both functioning on very little sleep and lots of stress which led to a lot of disagreements. I was struggling and suggested taking a break for a few weeks. But Christian fought for me and fought for us. He said he would agree to a break if that’s what I really wanted but encouraged staying together because he had heard that a lot of couples ended up breaking up after the initial break period and didn’t want that to happen to us. Even after seeing me at my worst, after all my breakdowns, struggles with weight and making decisions for my future, he wanted to be with me.
We survived that stressful school year and another summer apart. Then our junior year came. That was the year that my Grandpa passed away, the day before my 21st birthday. I remember getting the call that he had passed away and going straight to my dorm room. I sent Christian a text and let him know. He came over right away to be with me and made sure I was ok. I can always count on him to be there not only in good times, but in the bad times as well.
That summer when I was visiting him and his family, he took me out to eat and proposed after dinner. Of course, I said yes!
Senior year was stressful; not only did we have to worry about classes, but we also had to plan a wedding! We chose our wedding date to be the Monday after our graduation. We had our fair share of disagreements that year, but our engagement always stuck. Before we knew it, our wedding day was upon us. And that is when I knew.
All the moments we shared together- the good and the bad, had led up to this date. I am normally a nervous person and get anxious about everything. But the day of my wedding, instead of feeling nervous, I remember feeling happy and peaceful. The day had come where I got to marry my best friend. Despite all the stress, long distance, and the challenges we faced, we stayed together, and he made me feel safe, happy, and loved. That was the calmest I have ever felt, and I had no doubt that I was fulfilling my vocation.
Relationships are more than the happy moments and feel good moments. There will be disagreements, arguments, and challenges. It is part of the journey and can be healthy for the relationship and allow two people to grow closer together.
I did not have one specific moment where I knew that I would marry Christian, but when our wedding day had come, I knew I was marrying the right man. We were kids when we met and started dating. We grew up together and shared so many wonderful and stressful moments that led us to where we are today.
We have been together for 9 years now, married for 4, have a puppy, 3 kids, and another one on the way. Our marriage together has been a wonderful journey so far filled with love, joy, laughter, and with our kids, a lot of noise! Of course, we have our stressful moments and days where we do not always get along, but I would not change any of it. Life is a wonderful journey, and I am so blessed to experience it with my husband!
